Monday and Tuesday are productive days at Northrop Grumman and after work as I work on the ResourceScout proposal for New Jersey. Tuesday is also another bicycle commute. On the way home from work I'm cruising along quite nicely on the bike path/sidewalk on the eastbound side of 190th street. There is a little tailwind giving me an added push. I'm coming to a driveway east of Crenshaw and think to myself, "Those bushes would prevent a car from seeing me as I want to cross this driveway. And the way people drive these days, they certainly won't be looking for a bicycle." As I'm thinking this I get the feeling that there is a car that is going to recklessly barge in front of me. Sure enough, just as I'm getting to the driveway a black sedan rushes out the driveway and stops right smack dab in my path - completely blocking the crosswalk as I'm barreling eastbound at greater than 20 mph. I take evasive action as I see the driver's eyes get real wide - thinking that I am going to completely destroy the side of his car and it would be his fault. I'm able to barely miss his front bumper and stay out of harm's way as I make a sharp turn headed for the street. There is no point to any gesture here as I continue pumping along.
Person M_C calls me from San Francisco on Wednesday night. He moved to SF about 6 weeks ago. Person M_C is excited because he has a boyfriend now. And when he tells me that it has been three weeks, I believe that the world is coming to an end. We both laugh because it has been a long time since Person M_C has had a boyfriend for three weeks.
Because it is supposed to rain on Thursday the second bicycle
commute of the week does not happen. Instead I drive to work and take clothes
to get a mid-day run in, if possible. For some reason I am way out of control
and I recognize it. Thus I keep my mouth shut, "...don't say an effing word...", perform
productive tasks at Northrop Grumman, and keep any tears to myself on this day. Just
after 10 am I can take it no longer so I get out for a 5 mile run. Just as I
finish the run it starts raining, but I feel better. After lunch I am again starting
to break up (or down), so I put on whatever music that I have that has ANY
memories:
Two versions of "If you could read my mind" because they remind me of cold
winters in Michigan in the late 1970's and cold winter nights spent clubbing
in Southern California.
Two versions of Pachelbel's "Canon in D Major" because they always get me
to cry.
A re-mixed techno version of "Braveheart" because it reminds me of trudging through
the jungles of Burma - one step ahead of the military government.
And a Ron Van Den Beuken re-mix of "Timeless" because it gets the blood pumping
and always makes me forget about my problems. And it's a great ChiChi song!
I am not really mentally present at the meetings that I attend on Thursday afternoon. But I still contribute and re-focus the meetings when they become un-hinged from their main topics.
As I'm taking my running clothes out of the trunk of the car in my driveway I see Person A_M driving by. Of course, why did I expect otherwise? I motion for Person A_M to pull over and he does and we have a nice 5 minute conversation about school, mathematics, smiles, fun, and ice cream. When I turn to go in the house I feel my knees getting weak and when I get inside the house my hands are shaking. I can tell this is going to be a tough evening. So every hour on the half hour I go out and do some strengthening and stretching exercises for the abdominals and lower back in order to promote better health and posture. I should go run again today (beyond the 5 miles I put in at mid-day) but I'm tired so I just stick with the strengthening/stretching. And now all of the "memory" songs get played again at home. There are phone calls tonight from Person C_T, Scott (who I used to babysit and who'll be riding with me this Sunday), and Rob (an ex-neighbor who I used to ride with). Rob is going on a three week cycling trip starting in ten days. I am jealous.
On Friday I get out for a 30 minute brisk walk before work as a few sprinkles come down. After getting ready for work the rain is coming down in buckets as I drive to work. But an hour later the sun is shining and the sky is a bright blue.
Early on Friday, as I'm working away on a simulation, I say aloud to myself, "Oh I can do this!" A co-worker, who has snuck in and who I didn't hear, comes over to my office and wonders if I'm talking to him or to me. I tell him, "There's another option here. I could also be talking with my imagninary play friend from my youth, Ashley." I get a strange look from my co-worker. So I continue with, "And you should feel free to call Human Resources on me when you feel uncomfortable or if you feel that I need some help." My co-worker smiles, doesn't say a word, and goes back to his office. I listen carefully but I don't hear him pick up his phone to call Human Resources.
After work on Friday I get in a good session with the weights and mow/trim the lawn. And spend the remaining part of the evening relaxing while doing little errands around the house.
On Saturday I get out for a walk in the morning and go out every few hours to do abdominal/lower back strengthening/stretching until 2pm when Person C_T arrives. We get out for a bicycle ride down to the aquarium as I show Person C_T the place that I send so much time on a bicycle. We go have dinner for the second week in a row at Souplantation (when Person C_T's suggested place is too crowded) and then we browse at BesyBuy for home theatre systems. Later we relax and deny suggestions from Joe and Person J_VKPI to go out clubbing.
On Sunday I'm up and ready to go on the 50 mile bicycle ride that Scott needs to go on to get a boy scout merit badge. We ride up the San Gabriel river trail past the Whittier Narrows dam up towards the Santa Fe dam. The ride to the halfway (turnaround) point goes well and we call home and tell Mom and Dad that we are headed back for home. On the way home Scott struggles as one would expect of someone who doesn't regularly ride for more than an hour. But we make it back home and as Scott rushes in to take a shower and collapse, Mom and Dad are happy that I went along for the ride.
After my own shower I eat bread and cheese and diet Coke and watch the Spanish Grand Prix. And later I relax as the weekend, which has passed much more rapdily than most, winds down.